The verb “to thank” comes from a root word that means “to think or feel.” The Etymology Online website points out that “thank” is related to “thought” the way “song” is to “sing.” So the word for “memory” comes to mean “good memory.” The word for “thought” becomes “good thought.”

In their book, The Mindfulness and Acceptance Workbook for Depression: Using Acceptance and Commitment Therapy to Move Through Depression and Create a Life Worth Living, Kirk D. Strosahl and Patricia J. Robinson describe these two parts of our thinking as the reactive mind and the wise mind. Most likely, the reactive mind is the way of thinking that you are most familiar with. The reactive mind helps to make sense of the world around you.

It is easy for people who suffer from depression to get caught up in thoughts and feelings that allow the depression to become entrenched. It can reach a place where these depressive thoughts and feelings become a lens through which you look at and interpret the world. The depression shapes and forms how you see yourself and how you see others; it begins to give direction to the actions and choices you make.

One of the signs of depression is the tendency of your mind to produce negative thoughts about yourself and your life. Your mind is always generating thoughts. It is always looking at qualities and characteristics about who you are and how you are in life and judging if you have been right or wrong, good or bad. With depression, it seems like the only evaluations and judgments that get through are the negative ones.

When you are depressed, it is easy for your mind to produce automatic negative thoughts. It is like your mind gets stuck in a rut, and most of the thoughts that come to you are negative self-evaluations and self-judgments. It is like the depression places a filter on your mind, and the only thoughts that get through are negative ones.

It is easy to get caught up in a mindset that sees the world as a hard place. This is especially true if you struggle with depression. It is common for people with depression to ruminate over all that is going wrong with their lives. This mindset leads you to have negative perceptions about yourself, your relationships, and the world around you.

One of the goals of depression treatment is emotional and psychological flexibility.  When the depression shows up, you don’t give all your energy to trying to get rid of or avoid or lessen the depression.  Instead, you have enough emotional flexibility to let go of the struggle with the depression. 

One of the things that is true for most people who suffer from depression is that they can be really hard on themselves.  You look at how your life is controlled by the depression and it is easy to become harsh and self-critical.  You can ruminate on your failures, playing them over and over in your mind.  This can lead to a judgmental attitude where you begin to decide that you are lacking in some way, that there is something wrong with who you are as a person. 

Let’s begin with an exercise. Read the following statement and do all that you can to believe that it is completely true. As you do this, notice the thoughts that come to you: I am a perfectly capable, loving, and worthy person. What did you notice? If you are like most people, the more positive the thought you try to believe, the more resistance your mind offers.

Stories are the way we make meaning. Who am I and how will I be in the world? The answers to those questions come in the form of stories. Let’s imagine we are at a party. When you ask me who I am, I don’t respond by saying, “I am a 66-year-old white male, 5’11’’, with a thin frame, and salt and pepper colored hair.” I would probably share something like this, “My name is Gary. I have lived in this area for 17 years; originally, I am from Mississippi. I enjoy working out and playing golf.” In other words, I tell you a rudimentary story…and you would do the same.