Perhaps the title to this blog sounds a bit strange to you. It would make more sense to you if I was talking about how to stop being depressed or how to stop feeling depressed. That is the way we normally think about depression.

Imagine that you are floating down a river on an inner tube. You have never been to this river, but it is easy to relax as the water moves slowly. You are at peace and at ease. But soon you hear the sound of rushing water. You look ahead and see rapids.

You can say two things about the emotional upheaval that happens with loss, rejection, or disappointment. First, these emotions are normal. Second, these emotions are not only normal, but they are also important. These feelings tell you that you are experiencing distress in some area of your life that really matters.

Can I Live A Normal Life With Depression? If you are struggling with depression, you might consider that question to be nonsensical. If I have depression, then, no, my life is not normal.

“I am depressed…I have depression.” These are words I hear often when people come into my office for an initial session. I will ask them to describe what it is like when the depression is there.

Kristen Neff, in her book, Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself, identifies three core components of the practice of self-compassion. In previous posts, we have looked at the first two of these components.

When you are struggling with problems like anxiety, depression, relationship conflict, or stress in some area of your life, it is easy to conclude that the one thing all these problems have in common is you.

In her book, Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself, Kristin Neff says that self-compassion “entails three core components.

Depression is not sitting alone in a dark room feeling hopeless and sad. People who struggle with depression go to work, watch movies or plays, and interact with people in their lives. The struggle with depression means you may do a lot of these activities without a sense of joy or meaning. As you live on autopilot mode, you may get through the day, but it feels like you are just going through the motions.

When people who don’t know me very well find out I am a therapist, often they will ask, “What, exactly, do you do?” Of course, they have their own images of what I do: give advice, help people get in touch with their feelings. Many people describe therapy as analyzing your thoughts and feelings.