Nobody wants to experience a traumatic event. Trauma seems to be something imposed on you by another person or by difficult circumstances; it is not something you choose.

I am going to share a word with you, and then, I want you to just pause for a few minutes of silence and let’s see what happens: DOG.

A common symptom of trauma is the presence of flashbacks or other intrusive thoughts and feelings. Flashbacks happen when personal experiences of the past show up suddenly in your awareness with any conscious effort to bring them to mind.

In a previous blog I described five ways that you adapt to the experience of trauma. The first response is fight or vigilance.

Human beings can be incredibly resilient. When something bad happens to you, there are a variety of ways that you can adapt. You have been gifted with fight/fight/freeze instincts that mobilize you in response to threat.

I realized that nearly every part of my life was in a coping mode. With every trip to work or to the gas station or to the grocery store, there was the task at hand AND wondering about the odds of catching the virus at any of these places.

Many people come to my office have struggled with trauma, and the anxiety and depression that go with them, for a while, often for many years. They have tried all kind of things to make the thoughts and feelings of the trauma go away.

If you are struggling with trauma, it is easy to be caught up in the past or the future. Mindfulness and acceptance are practices that allow you to be in the present moment without trying to avoid what is happening or getting overwhelmed by what is happening.

John Kabat-Zinn defines mindfulness as “paying attention in a particular way: on purpose, in the present moment, and non-judgmentally” (Full Catastrophe Living, 1994). Each part of that definition is important if you are someone who is struggling with trauma, and the other feelings that go with it, like anxiety and depression.

If you have experienced trauma, control might be a big issue for you. By definition, trauma is an event that creates a high level of stress or fear, but you do not have the chance to escape or get away from it. When thoughts or feelings about the trauma show up later, it makes sense that you would want to avoid these negative internal experiences. So, you exert control, and you can do this in lots of ways.