You could say that regret is a normal part of relationships. No one does relationships perfectly.

Perpetual problems center on fundamental differences between you and your partner. They may be differences in personality, temperament, values, or world views.

Conflict is a normal part of any relationship; what matters is how you and your partner handle these arguments when they happen. One place to begin is realizing if you are dealing with a solvable or unsolvable conflict. In this blog, I will offer some suggestions for how to handle a solvable conflict.

One thing that can help you address problems when they come up is to realize that there are two types of conflicts in a marriage.

In our society and culture, we try to avoid negative emotions like anger, fear, stress, anxiety, or sadness.

When you see the word “habit, you probably think of a usual way of behaving or a tendency that you have settled into, as in "good eating habits."

Imagine that it is time for you to leave work and go home. Because you do this so often, you might not even be aware of what thoughts and feelings you have as you get in the car and drive home. This is an invitation to do something more intentional on the way home. Ask yourself: So what am I going home to?

In a previous blog, I described what Terry Real, in his book The New Rules of Marriage, calls the Core Negative Image (CNI) you have of your partner. This CNI consists of all the negative attitudes and actions that you assign to your partner.

A good relationship is not something you have. A good relationship is not something you are in. A good relationship is something you do. It is something you practice.

In two previous blogs, I shared some of the reasons that conflicts between you and your partner can become interactions that cause harm to each of you and the relationship. Andrew Christensen and Neil S. Jacobson described these reasons in their book, Reconcilable Differences.