About 21 million adults in the United States, (8.4%) have experienced a major depressive episode. More than one in ten young people in the United States are living with depression that disrupts their school, home, or work life. 17% of people ages 12-17 have had one major depressive episode in the last year.
All these statistics suggest that depression is not uncommon. And the numbers are probably higher, because many people try to live with depression without a diagnosis. There is a resistance to accepting help for your depression.
This resistance comes from a comes from a combination of psychological, emotional, and physiological factors that create barriers to getting help.
Self-Stigma and Shame
With the rugged individualism that is a part of American culture, you may believe that you should be able to push through the symptoms of depression. I am just a little sad. I am just a little tired. I just need to cheer up. I’ll be better after some rest. When that doesn’t happen, it is easy to see yourself as weak or a failure. The pervasive negative thoughts that are part of depression can make you feel that you are undeserving of support. Or you fear judgment from others.
Loss Of Motivation and Energy
When you are depressed, even the simplest tasks can seem difficult. It takes a lot of emotional energy to make the decision to seek help and follow through on that decision. It is hard to think about talking with someone about your struggles. This makes it hard to follow through with making and keeping appointments or using techniques that you learn in therapy.
Hopelessness and Despair
A core symptom of depression is pervasive hopelessness. You don’t just feel down or sad. You feel that your situation is beyond repair. No amount of help is going to make a difference. And so, your hopelessness becomes despair. You think about getting help, but you are also carrying the thought that seeking support is futile.
Fear of Burdening Others
When you are depressed, your negative thoughts tell you all the ways that you are a burden to your friends and loved ones. Your mind tells you that you will bring them down. Sadly, because you are hesitant to talk openly about your struggles, your friends may start to act differently around you. But that difference is because they don’t understand fully what is happening, not because you are a burden.
Isolation and Withdrawal
If you are carrying the belief that you’re a burden, it makes sense that you might pull away from them. Depression often leads to social withdrawal. You don’t want to be a burden, or you think being with others won’t really help. This creates a vicious cycle where your lack of social interaction makes it harder to seek help, perpetuating your disconnection and hopelessness.
Negative Thought Patterns
One of the main things I work on with people who struggle with depression is their cognitive distortions. Depression can skew your perception of situations and your ability to get help. One aspect of depression treatment is learning to look at these thoughts instead of through them. This gives you the psychological flexibility you need to develop a different relationship with these thoughts.
Trust Issues
These negative thought patterns can make it difficult to trust the healthcare professionals who want to help. Some people have had past experiences with getting help that, for whatever reason, did not work, so it becomes harder to seek help again.
Depression is a multifaceted mental health condition that presents many obstacles to accepting help. Understanding the complex interaction of self-stigma, hopelessness, loss of motivation and other factors is crucial in addressing these barriers. My depression treatment specialty page describes how the therapy process can help you develop a different relationship with your depression. Even in the presence of the thoughts and feelings of depression, you can choose actions that add meaning and value to your life.